The Cenacle Fenxiang – May/July 2010 Issue
Click HERE to download the May/July Issue.
The Cenacle Fenxiang – March/April 2010 Issue
Issue highlight: Holy Week Retreat for Chinese Students in the Philippines
Download the PDF copy HERE.
The Cenacle Fenxiang – FEB 2010 Issue
NEWSLETTER OF THE CENACLE CHINA MISSION • FEB. 2010
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(*Fenxiang is the Chinese word for “sharing”)
THE GAZE OF GOD by Sr. Meny Vera-Cruz
July is St. Ignatius de Loyola’s month, so to speak, since we celebrate his feast on July 31. So much has been written on his Spiritual Exercises and what I would like to share is just a very small aspect of my experience of making it year by year. I am struck by the method of prayer called “contemplation.” In prayer we are asked to “contemplate” a mystery in the life of Jesus, for example. For me, it means to enter into the mystery by gazing on the scene, by listening and looking. Contemplation invites us to gaze deeply and profoundly into the event. Thus it is not just to look, nor to see but to GAZE. When one gazes at something, the “gazer” becomes affected by the object of the gaze. As when one contemplates something happens and the process transforms.
This is what happens in the prayer of contemplation. But often, we get lost in our own contemplation that we forget that God also contemplates us, looks at us. It is not just me that gazes, it is also God who gazes on me. In one of my retreats, years ago, I was asked to reflect on Iain Matthew’s book, The Impact of God. Some of the most beautiful lines of the book say:
“It has been said that a person is enlightened’, not when they get an idea’, but “when someone looks at them.” A person is enlightened when another loves them. The eyes are windows on to the heart; they search the person out and have power to elicit life.
So the gospel has eyes which are not dispassionate, nor merely passive. Their gaze is not an art gallery gaze, wandering from exhibit to exhibit and leaving what they see obviously unchanged. Their gaze engages what they see and affects it: For God, to gaze is to love and to work favours. These eyes are effective: “God’s gaze works four blessings in the soul: it cleanses the person, makes her beautiful, enriches and enlightens her.”
The gaze of God affects! Who can forget Jesus looking at Peter after he denied him three times? And Jesus looking at the rich young man with such deep love, I often wonder what happened to him in his later years. Would he remember at some moment in his life that loving look of Jesus?
Iain Matthews continues: “A person is enlightened when someone looks at them.’ Chaos is enlightened when God looks at it. The Bridegroom casts his gaze across the face of the abyss and sprays life across it. This is John of the Cross’ amazing understanding of creation: the universe, each element in it, each event in it, and the web of those events held together – all thought, all friendship, all history – are given being by the eyes of Another, eyes “communicating” being to the world and to the person. So does St. Ignatius when he invites for example, the pray-er to gaze on the Trinity contemplating the world. It is said that he often gazed at the sky from his window and looked at the stars in the night and his eyes would fill with tears. I imagine he was filled with such awe and wonder at the beauty of the stars that they led him to God, the creator of such beauty.
In this month where we celebrate the feast of St. Ignatius, we ask for the grace of seeing but most of all, of allowing ourselves to be seen – to be gazed at by this God who loves us –and who sees beyond our failings.
Praying One’s Suffering
Who among us has not drank from the cup of suffering? It could be an unexpected illness, an accident, psychological difficulties, troubled relationships, betrayal, loss of meaning, death of a loved one… The question we spontaneously ask would be something like: “Why me?” As we reflect on the reality of suffering, maybe we can also ask ourselves: What is God’s invitation to me with regard to my suffering? How am I to bring this experience into my relationship with God?
When we find that suffering has made a temporary home in our hearts, we are often told to “bring this experience to prayer”. Many are puzzled. How can we concretely “bring this experience to prayer?”
The Gospel of Matthew has Jesus saying:
Come to me, all you who labour and are over burdened and I will give you rest. Shoulder my yoke and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. Yes, my yoke is easy and my burden light. (Matthew 11: 28-30)
When we are in pain, a very spontaneous cry from our depths is Lord! Help me! Save me! Spare me! If the suffering persists, an invitation to explore is how I can share my suffering with Jesus and not be plunged into despair. How can I turn my initial questioning into something like: “Lord, how do we go through this together? Where will this bring me? Where will this bring us?” How do I get through this and still be whole? We have two options when faced with suffering. One is to move into despair, despondency, bitterness, some form of “death” even while still living OR go through the process of questioning ourselves, re-prioritizing, searching for the meaning behind the experience, and holding on to hope and faith.
The faith questions we could be asking in the midst of pain might be: How can I walk with God when I’m hurting so much? When I don’t know how? How can I still take on the yoke of Jesus when I can’t seem to stand it anymore?
A homily once explained what this imagery of taking on the yoke is about. It seems that in the Jewish culture, one yoke is used to harness two bullocks. First to be harnessed is an older, more seasoned bullock. Then, a younger bullock needing to be trained for the job is fitted with this same yoke. These bullocks are tied to huge stone mills which they are supposed to turn by going around and around. The more seasoned bullock is placed in the outer path thus leading the work and pulling most of the weight. The younger bullock in the inner path follows and thus learns to carry the weight and do the job.
When I go through some suffering, can I hear Jesus’ invitation to go to him and let him carry most of my burden as we continue to walk together? Do I hear him ask me to stop struggling, stop trying to control things, doing things my way and just let go?
Sharing our pain with Jesus might seem easy enough for us to do because we could have an image of Jesus as the miracle worker who will take away all our problems. Sharing our pain with Jesus means allowing Jesus to stay with our pain and that might mean that he will not solve our problems or take away our pain. In the Bible we often hear him say, Fear not! I am with you. He did not say, I’ll solve your problems for you!
In sharing my suffering with Jesus, I can choose how to respond to painful experiences. I can choose to grow and shape it into a positive force in my life. To be alive and to grow, inevitably involves pain. How do we make our way through the darkness? How can we say “yes” to growth and be open to new life? Life’s hurts and death are an integral part of our life but they need not be the center.
I would like to suggest a simple prayer form where we could bring our experience of suffering to prayer. I call this Prayer of Open Hands – a way of sharing my suffering with Jesus.
Reflecting on the layers of meaning of “open hands” one can see open hands as speaking of surrender and letting go of one’s control as contrasted to clenched fists or closed hands which speak of control, of being closed. Open hands also connote a posture of begging after realizing one’s emptiness, one’s poverty as creature. I realize that I am a beggar, that I can’t do anything without God. It also speaks of the capacity to receive and to be filled after having been emptied. God can pour graces and I am more disposed to receive.
To begin the prayer, take a comfortable sitting position where your body is relaxed and alert… your hands on your lap with your palms open and facing up. Take a few deep breaths — breathing in deeply through your nostrils … letting the air fill your lungs and your abdomen… breathing out slowly through your nostrils… As you continue your gentle breathing, feel your body going into deeper relaxation… Moving gently into your quiet center, you become aware of coming into the presence of the Holy One… called into the presence of God…
Recall the words of Matthew 11:28-30 Come to me, all you who labour and are over burdened and I will give you rest. Shoulder my yoke and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. Yes, my yoke is easy and my burden light.
Pray to the Spirit of Jesus for the grace to be open and to be generous in responding to what Jesus may be inviting you to.
Recall an experience of great personal suffering and pain you have been carrying. Try to come up with a symbol for this experience. This suffering can be imaged as a broken heart, a torn letter, a withered plant or whatever else speaks to you. 
Imagine that you come before Jesus and you hear him speak the words from Scripture addressed to you. You may even see Jesus with his arms open and outstretched to you – a symbol of welcome. Hear Jesus say to you, Come to me, you who are heavily burdened and I will give you rest.
In your imagination see yourself stretch out and open your hands to Jesus. Imagine you are holding in your open hands the symbol of your suffering that you want to surrender or hand over to Jesus. As you do so, repeatedly pray this short petition: Into your hands, O Lord, I surrender my pain. Into your hands I rest my body, my mind, and my being. Keep repeating this until you are brought to a point of quiet and silent presence.
At the end of your time of quiet prayer gently pray the Our Father.
Let this be my last word, that I trust in Your love.
(Rabindranath Tagore)
Sr. Malen Java, rc
March 2009
GOODNESS
Homily of Fr. Jett Villarin SJ during the Perpetual Vows of Sr. Susay Valdez
27 Dec 2008
Our Lady of Pentecost Parish
Good has many senses which can reflect the many moods and movements of our life. You can say that the moods of Susay or of anyone here can swing about these many senses of good.
One sense of goodness is that of “goodness gracious.” I’m sure Mother Superior Meny here and the sister have gone through this mood many times. “My goodness” has nothing to do really with goodness; it is an exclamation or sigh of exasperation, of surprise or wonder over nothing good or gracious at all.
You can also understand goodness in terms of being “good at something,” that is, being competent, clever, or skillful. I’m sure that Sister Susay is professing the vows not because she is an expert in poverty, chastity and obedience. On our own, we’re never really good at these things. They are an invitation to shape a life patterned after the Christ we profess to love.
Good has another sense when you’re playing blackjack. “Forced to good” we say when we are compelled to stay with the hand we’ve been dealt with. The mood mirrors someone being forced to a corner, someone who is unfree. Another sense is when something is “good to go” which is to say it is okay enough. “As good as it gets” indicates a mood of making do, of being resigned to whatever is there.
So again, you can say that Susay is here not out of exasperation or competence. She is not here by default or because of closed doors and options. She could have been a wonderful mother and wife and perhaps a nightclub singer. She is not here because life in the Cenacle is as good as it gets.
She is here by willful choice and intentional freedom. She is here because by her life (more than her words) she is like John the evangelist proclaiming what she has heard and seen with her very eyes and touched with her hands and heart: the Word of life, who predicated good of every single thing created from nothing. She is here out of the goodness of God from whom the goodness of everything is drawn
(Thérèse Couderc).
When I asked Susay why she has stayed in the Cenacle all these years, she replied that this is where she has found God’s Goodness. She has discovered God’s Goodness in the goodness of the people she has helped in the ministry of the Spiritual Exercises. She has known God’s Goodness to be real in the goodness of her very self revealed in the intimacy of prayer and in the goodness of her sisters lived in
community. Later in the liturgy, we will see the incarnation of that goodness when her sisters profess their commitment to take care of her. She is going to wear an old ring used to be worn by another
Cenacle sister who has since passed away, to signify to us and to God the goodness of the “yes” that threads through the life of every Cenacle sister from day to day and from generation to generation.
The other sense of goodness has something to do with rightness and desirability, We say something is good when it is right and desirable. But because of our blind spots and fallen histories, the many possible appearances and directions of rightness and desire can and do collide. Hence, goodness too can be broken and crucified, by fear and doubt, and by forces as big as betrayal or as petty as envy.
How this can happen so easily to goodness is found in the very mystery of goodness itself. The power of goodness is its power to surrender. Surrender, not in the sense of giving up or resignation. The power of goodness is its power to give in and let go, which is the power to trust and be the one who is given.
If goodness surrenders itself to be bound and broken and crucified, it is surrender as well that ultimately transforms and resurrects goodness to life. For Thérèse Couderc, surrender is more than offering oneself; it is to keep oneself continually turned to God in a process of metanoia or conversion that may very well mean dying to everything and to one’s very self. If I may add, it could mean dying as well to goodness to make room for what is better or greater; to surrender is to let go of the rightness and desires that may on the surface give quick meaning to our lives, but in truth are fleeting movements that leave us empty and lost and tired.
Susay, remember your own experience of the Contemplatio ad Amorem when you were doing the Fourth Week of the Spiritual Exercises. There you found the quiet joy of constantly turning to God, which turning is a lifelong labor of love. Of course, there and then you knew in the heart that the ad amorem too is God’s constant turning to us, whichturning is God’s eternal joy and labor of love.
Before we close, I draw you to another sense or mood of goodness which happens when we begin to fit and gather and belong together. The life you Susay have chosen is good because this is where Susay will be most Susay. If the vows and the Cenacle were a dress, when Susay wears this dress, this dress becomes her. You yourself said, “dito ako makikiugnay sa Kanya.” Dito rin Siya makikibagay at makikisabay sa iyo, sa buo mong pagka-ikaw.
And so in the midst of all this goodness, we wish you Susay one more good. We say to you: good bye. Good bye not in the sense of tearful weddings when parents part with their beautiful daughter. We wish you good bye in the ancient sense of the word: God be with you. You have found joy and life and goodness here, where you are most you, when you are most with God. Help us to turn to what you have found, to what was from the beginning, what you have heard and seen with your very eyes, what you have looked upon and who your hands have touched. By what you are about to proclaim and do, help us believe the very goodness in everything and the very goodness of God.
Photos from Susay’s Perpetual Vows
Photos from Sr. Susay’s Perpetual Vows last 27 December have now been posted on our Photo Gallery. You may access the album directly here:
http://www.cenaclephilsing.org/photo-gallery/final-vows-of-sr-susay-valdez/
2009 Calendar of Programs
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The 2009 Calendar of Programs at the Cenacle Retreat House and Spirituality Center have been posted. Please refer to the Calendar Overview when making plans for your group or for individual retreats. |
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CLICK HERE for a more detailed description of the
programs we offer at the Cenacle or call or visit us at: Cenacle Retreat House & Spirituality Center 59 N. Reyes St., Loyola Heights, Quezon City Tel Nos. 434-2054, 434-3064 Telefax: 434-6943 Mobile number: 0927-5608032 E-mail: cenacle.philippines@gmail.com |
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Website Relaunch
Welcome to our newly revamped website! We would like to thank you for all patience throughout these months while we performed some necessary upgrades. Some new features of our website include the following:
- Easier navigation and layout
- Updated Calendar and Schedule of Programs
- Description of our Retreats and Programs
- Audio clips of excerpts of Cenacle audio CDs
- Photo Gallery of events and activities
- Introduction of Gift of Prayer – Cenacle Gift Certificates
We welcome your comments and suggestions at website@cenaclephilsing.org.
Sing of Him – More Prayers from the Upper Room
Produced by the Jesuit Music Ministry and the Jesuit Communications Foundation, Inc., Sing of Him is the second album from the Cenacle Sisters Philippines – Singapore Region following the success of Prayers from the Upper Room.
Last Supper
Seasons passed swiftly in His heart
Echoing memories of lakes and hills
Pressing crowds and sheltering silence
They were there with Him, as tonight.
And while the night Deepened into darkeness
He rose with one more lesson to give:
I have called you friends…
They are familiar to us, many of these songs. But now arranged for and sung by two voices, they speak to us anew. For these songs are celebrations of a very special friendship: that between God and us. A tremendous, astonishing, unbelievable gift. A lasting grace.
And so with hearts full of awe and longing, we follow Him who first called us His friends. May the friendship of Jesus lead you through your heart’s own seasons, across lakes and hills, through crowd and quiet, darkness to light. And may these songs of friendship become truly your prayers from the Upper Room, forged by broken bread and shared cup, and one irrevocable, self-emptying Love.
Click HERE to view photos of the Album launching last December 2007.
Album Tracks:
To listen to audio clips, please download and install Adobe Flash Player for your appropriate browser.
Sing of Him - Featuring Atoy Salazar, SJ and Bubbles Bandojo, RC [0:43m]: Play Now | Play in Popup How Beautiful - Featuring Oggie Benipayo and Bubbles Bandojo, RC [0:40m]: Play Now | Play in Popup Joy Is Like The Rain - Featuring Jun-jun Borres, SJ and Bubbles Bandojo, RC [0:32m]: Play Now | Play in Popup God Is Love - Featuring Susay Valdez, RC and Bubbles Bandojo, RC [0:34m]: Play Now | Play in Popup Only This I Want - Featuring Tony de Castro, SJ and Bubbles Bandojo, RC [0:34m]: Play Now | Play in Popup Yahweh, The Faithful One - Featuring Veepee Pinpin and Bubbles Bandojo, RC [0:48m]: Play Now | Play in Popup Dwelling Place - Featuring Susay Valdez, RC and Atoy Salazar, SJ [0:36m]: Play Now | Play in Popup Father, Mercy - Featuring Bishop Chito Tagle, D.D, S.T.D., and Bubbles Bandojo, RC [0:44m]: Play Now | Play in Popup Song Of Ruth - Featuring Tony de Castro, SJ and Bubbles Bandojo, RC [1:08m]: Play Now | Play in Popup Holy Darkness - Featuring Susay Valdez, RC and Bubbles Bandojo, RC [0:38m]: Play Now | Play in Popup Naalala Mo - Featuring Veepee Pinpin and Bubbles Bandojo, RC [0:33m]: Play Now | Play in Popup One Little Candle - Featuring R.B. Hizon, SJ and Bubbles Bandojo, RC [0:30m]: Play Now | Play in Popup The Memorare - Featuring Veepee Pinpin, Susay Valdez, RC and Bubbles Bandojo, RC [0:30m]: Play Now | Play in Popup Sa Pag-Ibig Ng Panginoon - Featuring Sheila Mae Jaso, RC and Bubbles Bandojo, RC [0:38m]: Play Now | Play in Popup Spirit of God - Featuring Oggie Benipayo and Bubbles Bandojo, RC [0:38m]: Play Now | Play in Popup Amazing Grace - Featuring R.B. Hizon, SJ and Bubbles Bandojo, RC with obligato by Jett Galindo [0:48m]: Play Now | Play in Popup I Sing The Mighty Power of God - Featuring Himig Heswita and Friends [0:33m]: Play Now | Play in Popup
Cenacle Retreat House and Spirituality Center
From its beginnings in 1968, the Cenacle Retreat House has always been an oasis of peace and solitude right in the midst of the city.
Sing of Him
Listen to some excerpts from latest audio production from the Cenacle Sisters. You will need Adobe Flash Player installed on your browser to listen to the clips.